Thank God the National Team won against Indonesia to win the AFF Suzuki cup last night so PM declared tomorrow; Friday and happens to be the last day of year as a Public Holiday. I have tonnes to do - need to register the children for next school term, then I might be meeting Audrey or/and hopefully can do some spring-cleaning.
FYI, I enjoyed doing the Birthday party for the kids. They had their favourite friends over and I know they had fun. They've grown so fast... That's why I keep telling Kelvin who has a 1 year old daughter, no matter how tired or how demeaning some situation might be, just enjoy it coz it is phases of life your kids go through and it aint coming back. Some parents might find it troublesome but that is life but instead of looking at it negatively, look at it as time of nourishing and sharing and spreading and just watching them grow. How fulfilling.....
I guess, it is also not to late to say Merry Christmas. I had a blast!!!! How was yours?. Our theme this year was RED. Thanks to the Todas' who does really want it to happen and at the end of the day it is actually about the family. And on a personal note, I like to thank those who are followers of my blog for your support and your willingness to spend your precious time to read my 'journey' especially Dorothy (whose reading because she is homesick!!!) and to you, you, you.....
I can't believe it!!!! Megan turned 7 last Saturday. They grow fast. I, on the other hand is going towards my forties. I am at that time where I feel the needs of my kids are more important and I should mellow to the background.
With that thought in mind, I need to do a combine party for the kids and as usual, it will only be done end of November; when Ezra turn 9. As they grow the demand for all sorts of things overwhelm me!!!! Thank God they have only one mouth. At this age, I guess you are allow to be selfish - its all "I want this, I want that...", ignorance - it doesn't matter whether the parents can afford it and being working like dogs, unrealistic - like I will buy the Sony PSP when I, can't even afford to buy myself that Sony MP3!!!!
No matter what, I know I will throw them the 'biggest' party (by my kids' standard) and I shall enjoy doing it. So I would just thank my brothers and lovely sister; whom my kids adore so much for your up coming help in making this event a success one. :)
I am in an emotional wreck!!!!! Blame it on hormones....... or all the sad stories Fiona has been telling me. STOP IT, FIO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sucker you!!!!!!
Actually it is not her fault. I find Fiona rather amusing sometimes. Although going through problems of her own (who isn't), she keeps my feet grounded and feeding me spiritual food and for that I thank you.
The Moth is involve with the TYT birthday's parade (this Saturday). So every morning since Tuesday, the kids and I will pick Dad up to send us to school and work, in Anddy's car. And for that 3 days; 45 minutes drive, I had to endure comments upon comments from him. If it wasn't for my tardiness for being late (not in one of those days the children were late!!!), it would be the way I parked, the route I took and even the traffic policemen.
Day 1 was ok. I told him to bear with me for another few days. Day 2, I told MYSELF to bear with him for another day. And today, the devil in me got loose.......
All I want to say is, "Dad, I am sorry for yelling and saying those words to you, but at that moment I feel nothing I did was good enough for you! It was soooo like you. I remember many years back, we were driving home; just the two of us; you were telling me how disappointed you are in me for not being able to go to local Universities to further my study and I remember I cried because I feel like I'd failed you - I was 19. That episode of life are always at the back of my head and it will replayed every time when ever the episode like this morning occur. It's ok now Dad. I am just sorry it happened and I want you to know that I still I love you because you are my Abba."
2 decades later, the bitterness surface. Maybe it's a good thing, now the inner healing should start. I always know that God has a purpose for me, even when I didn't further my study. I didn't want to. The desire was not there and I never regretted. That scroll would be nice - I don't think I need it to prove to man because by the end of if, it is He who provides and matter most.
Just to let YOU know, I don't hold grudges towards my own dad. The blood is thicker than water and no matter how disgusted we as children feel about it, we are the one that have to live with him. So dad, I pray that we will accept our differences, accept the fact that we need each other and that the good Lord will give you a good health and live to see Boy, Gigel, Bujang, Jaja and Girl graduate and walk the aisle........ Amen.
Monday, August 16, 2010
I do not know how to tell you of my feeling nor do I know where to start. Never in my life have I received such adoration, admiration and pure sweet naiveness. I am talking about my son Ezra. When I came back from work last Friday, he shared that the Math's teacher slapped him just because he did not do his "vertical form" in his math's paper. He claimed he didn't cry, only that his eye near his cheek where the teacher left red fingers marked were a bit wet.... :(
I do not 'abuse' my children by slapping their faces. I do pull ears and canning them on their legs, butt even hands and palms. So when somebody else decided to leave their palm's mark on my kid's face, I get emo.... Who dare to slapped by baby.... I carried him in my stomach for eight months. I went through period of dizziness, nausea, bloated feet and face, water retention, morning sickness while carrying him yet it was such a joy knowing that he is the perfect gift given especially for me (James 1:17), a gift I've longed and prayed for. You are talking about my child, my beloved..
This was the issue that I actually wanted to raise during the PTA meeting. I've heard of this particular teacher's tantrum and I wanted it to stop before my kid had his share - he's not such an angel either.... I was actually wrong when I said PTA is not the platform. When it involves my child's education and his well being in school, PTA should be one of the channel to voice out concern. In stead they chose to be brought down by silly issues that even doesn't reflect unity - for example, last year they only did a ramah-tamahaidilfihtri and why? The answer by the vice president even amused me; majority of the student are Muslims. Duh!!!!!! Where is your sensitivity. This is not even a SekolahPondok or SekolahAgama. This is a Missionary School, started by Christians who realised the needs and how important it was to educate the people be it Chinese, Iban, Bidayuh or even Malays and it was out of selfishness and an act of love. I can go on... Somebody please stop me....
I called the class teacher, who at first was very reluctant to take up my case. I understand from my boy, she did approached him to find out on his side of the story. That was on Monday and until today, I am still waiting for her call....
The thing that amuses me most are how our children take comfort, look-up highly and trusting us the parents to handle their problems. When my son found out that I will confront the teacher, he was so happy as if saying 'now she;s going to get it! You don't know who you are dealing with!. You are dealing with my mom - the Queen, the goddess in my household', then he was at peace....
I dread the day when I would not be able to be there for him, to help him solve problems and just letting him know - it's ok, I will handle this for you... But in the process I do hope I do not pampered the boy so much until he is so depended on me. I would not want to handicapped him like that. When that time comes, will he still look-up to me? Will he still sees me as his Knight in shinning armour?
I guess sooner or later it is I, myself that actually have to let go. As long as I still keep him under my wings, he would not be able to gain the strength to fly but until that time, I think I am happy to know such a creature so dependent on me. Let me enjoy that feeling because I know I will die a little bit every time I let go even though just a tiny bit.....
Saturday, July 31, 2010
My weekends is packed! I do not have time to just laze around now. Kids are demanding too. So, I guess I have to squeeze in whatever is left of my time.
So what's new?
Kuching Fest started today. It's near my office but I do not see myself going there because it is just too expensive but maybe I will bring the kids once..... Wouldn't hurt.
And the Kuching Regatta is on starting yesterday. I would love to see but hating the crowds and the jams.
Having something on with Fiona tomorrow so I thing I will call it A Day.
I am still waiting for Fiona to finish work so we could go to Tarot and hang-out. Not as if I have nothing to do but sometimes spending times (and money) like this is a stress buster!! Besides, it's the weekends. I just got back from my 4 days leave. Believe me; I snoozed the whole day on Tuesday. I even skipped lunch.... LOL!!!!
Weekend is here. I shall say "What weekends?". With the kids schedules; I hardly have time for myself..... Am not complaining (try) since most of the schedules are my own doing. Here's to the next 20 years of sending off and picking up kids from school and activities..............
I am STRESS!!!!!!!!!!!
Do not ask me what, why ok. Just be there for me. Sometimes that's enough.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
That's the MOTH & Me @ Tanah Lot
I couldn't believe that a year has passed by since my trip to Bali. It was an exciting trip and looking back, I am amazed at how me and the MOTH survived "our crisis" and everyday I thank the Lord for providing and never letting us out of His sight. At times it was difficult and it still does but I believe at that one point when you feel the lowest, that is the time when you have to gather your strength and soar higher. We are living by His grace now, not because we have to but because we want and we NEED to and as long as we depend on our own strength we can never see Him working in us. So we are letting go......
On a lighter side, my friend, Fiona and I have been talking about how at our work place, all the front line personnel consist of those in their mid thirties and in 10 years down the road most of us will be in our late forties. Imagine being serve by grannies. I am not insulting for I speak of myself. Unfortunately, there is nothing I can do unless I resign; still the company might not replace me as at now we do have the man power and with evolving technologies they might do away with human touches. The only field available is in the sales team. I wouldn't want to do sales although I've seen, financially lives changed for some of those who is reaping the fruits of their sweat. I envy the fruits but not the sweat. I've joined loads of those.... Avon, Elken.... you know what I mean but I am just not meant for it. I am accepting the fact that I'll be a working ant for the rest of my life but hey, it pays the bills and feed mouths, so I am contented.
With effect from July 2010 the maternity leave was raised from 60 days to 90 days. Fiona finds that hilarious and as for me.... I am still hoping. I think it is ok for the government to do that but for a company that relies on manpower that produces high level of productivity, hiring women would be their last resort. Although the reason is more so that mother and baby can bond, giving time for them to nurture through breastfeeding and spending time together. Raising children is not easy these days. With both parents working, more depends on nursery, babysitters, playschools to take care of the children and only spend quality time maybe on weekends. Growing up then were more easy. Children were exposed to elements but parents were not scared. It's different now, sometimes I feel we live in fear. Fear for our children, no, fear for what might or will happen to our children and that makes things worsts. But you can't blame them for feeling like that.
If I am given that 90days to nurture, I would and hopefully I can go back to work again and do my best to "pay" my boss for their generosity. My point is if all bosses were to think $$$$$$ and refuses to acknowledged that indeed women play a very big role in our society then our society can never grow mature and we will forever fall behind. Sometimes when you react to that action of giving, you are actually receiving the blessing. And Women, please don't misused the trust and benefit. POWER TO THE WOMAN!!!!!!!!
This morning, the alarm didn't ring. It took us 10 minutes to get ready and we were on the road at 7.10am!!! and of coz the kids were late for school.
My weekends routine from now will be filled; driving the kids to their activities. I've enrolled Beth for piano lessons starting middle of this month and she will start class at 11.30am for an hour. After lunch, she will be off to the Girl's Brigade in church and only finishes at 5pm. Ezra has not decided/joined on any activities so far but I have to commend him for helping at Toda's Ark and Toda's Farm.
The MOTH has finally agreed on going to THE Church and I am very happy coz all my family members are there but I just wish the service starts early (8am). For me that time is neither there nor here...... The reality is when it comes to God, it is not about me at all....
I love routine and I value the fact that I go through my days systematically. Where am I heading?
The fact that I didn't do anything productively over the weekend, sucks!!!!
BUT, I finally bought a Note Book for myself but I was unable to go online yesterday. Imagine the stress and on top of that didn't managed to snooze....
School holidays is going to be over by this weekends. At the beginning of it, I had so many plans but I guess as time flies, you wonder......
Anyway, I enrolled Ezra & Beth for the Bible camp last Friday at St. Faith. Unfortunately Beth had to be quarantined for the Hands, Foot & Mouth Disease - poor fellow. She was really looking forward to spending the night in church with the friends. As for Ezra, of coz he enjoyed himself.
They had a mini concert on Saturday night and we came late because the MOTH had to sent the little brother to the airport enrouted Kuala Lumpur. I missed the marching part but was in time to see the little boy singing and stomping his feet to the sound of the drums. At that time you cannot but feel emo - seeing the little fellow in-front singing when a few years back he was just MY little baby....
I believe that church plays a very important part in ones lives. They gives support, they teaches values that we requires and yes, they made me what I am today. I wouldn't be me if it wasn't for things I've learnt from my Youth involvement in church. Somebody ever tell me - "Let your kids be in church and most of your problems are solved".
When they were little, I used to bring them in a baby basket, then a stroller until they know how to behave. In spite of the loud music they seemed rather relaxed and I guess they grew up in this environment and I am pleased.
Then, I wanted Beth to learn Piano but really the timing is suck!!! So I guess I have to hold that thought.
I am working on a project at the moment (NO!!! it's not baby-making) but I can't disclose it yet. What ever it is, I do need your support. Until then.....
Before I start, Happy belated Gawai Dayak to all my "kaban-belayan". Ngajih ka kita gayu guru gerai nyamai, lantang senang ngibun menua.
My family has the tradition of only having gawai eve dinner at my mom's place. This year because all my in-laws (from my husband's side) from outstation (KL and Miri) came back for the occasion; we decided to miss the dinner at Sri Ijah and headed to kampung instead.
And of cause, my mom-in-law managed to come up with a sumptuous meal for everybody. My only regret; I didn't take any photos of the occasion.
Another tradition is the visiting tradition. The family (I Meant :FAMILY; Dad, Mom, Ivy & hubby with 3 sons, Terry(sometimes), I & hubby, Ezra & Beth, Anddy & David & Snah.) We will sometimes go in two or three cars. Every year we always visit the same houses. Sometimes I wonder whether people find us annoying by visiting in a large group like that.
I do like the visiting tradition my family is doing because somehow the spot light wouldn't be on one person but a group as a whole and I feel secure about that. I meant - It open a door for me to know them well but not exposing myself too much. It is not a bad thing, It just gives me space!!!
Another tradition that we are trying to start is the gathering of the Sanub. Sanub was my dad's dad (my grand) so you get the idea. We had such fun!!!!! We were suppose to have one before Gawai but my uncle Sehat (dad youngest brother) father-in-law passed away a week before the occasion so they had to postpone it till next year. But that doesn't stopped my cousins (my dad's elder brother kids) for having our own private party. Check my face book with all the photos. These photos were taken at oe of those gathering last year.
My cuzsss and aunty
My uncles - Sanub's sons
What we made them do.....
What a week!!!!! So many projects...... so little time, I need a laptop. If only somebody can give me one. LOL!!!!!!!
Actually, I just came back from dinner@Sri Ijah. We had mee soup; as usual. I had Martini on the rock and they said I AM DRUNK!!!!!! LOL!!!!!!!!
yeah.... a mother's work is never finish. I went for my girl's school PTA meeting yesterday; as if I have nothing better to do - but the MOTH kind of got excited after attending my boy's PTA meeting a week before and would like to see how's this one will be.
As usual the response were very poor. The school has around 600 students but the only less than 40 parents were there. The teachers were there because it was their duty and they were not given the choice but for a parents to be there; well... it was a choice. I will try to make a point to attend this kind of meeting because it involves my children's well being - I want them to study in a conducive environment and I want to know what is going on in the school.
I have to congratulate the committee for doing a good job. They ran their activities well, garnered enough funds to help the school and the balance sheet were in order and fantastic. My boy's PTA should learn from my girl's PTA!!!!!
I had a good Sunday - with the Lord by my side, who wouldn't. I hope you had one too. Enjoy the 4days week ya.
I hope it is still not late to published this. We had an argument a day before his birthday. It was about how much he spent on his first wife. We are tight and spending like that really worried me but I guess he is also right coz we rely very much on her, we need to really take good care of her. I just need him to tell me the truth sometimes. It was not so much about the money(even though it was the main contributor) but in being honest. I know he did it so; I wouldn't freak-out. Just throw it to me; I might retaliate but I will bounce back and be ok - we will be ok.
SOOOOOOO........ as the Irish put it:-
“May you never steal, lie or cheat. But if you have to steal, then steal away my sorrows. If you have to lie, then lie with me all the nights of our life. If you have to cheat, then cheat death because I don’t want to live a day without you”
Happy Birthday. We love you Maysun Redjo - wonderful husband to me and a caring dad to Ezra & Beth.
for the absence. Only when I read the news this morning that I had the itch to log-in again. Yeah.. Kenny Sia kind of reminded me that blogging use to be my passion. Don't know where I went wrong?. Time? I've been playing my kid's PC games (I am a wedding planner in Wedding Dash...). Story? I've been out and dining almost every week mostly with Fiona (yeah... I took some tasty photos).
I just ran out of ideas and I do feel I lack the presentation....
Anyway, I attended my first PTA today. I wanted to bring up some issues that I feel necessary. My son has been saying that his math teacher is not really approachable. The kids are so scared of her. Even to ask question.... I just feel that she should be more willing. I mean she threw books too. If you are a teacher and it is your duty to give your pupil the best you can give, to show them what they don't know. I think it is ones proudest moment when we teach a person and that person actually understand it. It's hard work, I realised; that's why I am not one.
When I reached the meeting I found that that is not the platform I can use to voice my concern about a teacher. So sorry Presscar, look like we need to find another way of solving this issue.
Anyway, one thing that I learned was, every parents should come to their children's PTA and get an insight of what's going on in their school. One may not be in the AJK (committee) but being an outsider is more fruitfull, at least you are informed and involved.
So the next meeting I am gearing up all my friends to be involved.
Today is the last day of my leave. What a week. It is not enough people. I wish I can go on leave forever and still get pay - dream on......
Did I tell you the MOTH managed to paint half of the wall of my living room. I AM happy even though I was a bit unsure about the colour at first. We have to put the project on hold.... I'll post the photo when we are done.
This photo was taken when he was half way doing it. I just want to show the difference.. I kind of like it. If we manage to finish the project I will let you know.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
If I have the power, I will try to make you happy in every ways I can - avoiding all the hurts, pains, unhappiness and hard ache. It will be a world of no stress and just pure bliss and happiness. We will go through life with no worries..... and we don't have to deal with silly and stupid issues that binds us to a point of breaking us.
But I am not God and I don't have the answer to your questions. I breaks sometimes but that doesn't make me any more weak. It is just life, you go through phases. You wouldn't know the cause of your action until you take that leap. Nobody says it is easy - it will pull you down, breaks you and you sometimes loose hope but you can count on the divine power that is more mighty, more powerful to hold you.
And after all that has been said and done nothing seems matter but HIM.
www.365greetings.com
Saturday, March 27, 2010
How do you measure a happy marriage?
Or even success for that matter. Does having loads of monies or materials things leads to it and does that really counts?
You must be wondering where I am going with this questions. Well…. I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching lately (pardon my absence; apart from having a corrupted PC, I have been busy being busy..).
I have a colleague who is still single and our goal for this year is to find him a good girl to marry. So that’s our target this year. So far he went to one(1) blind date. She was introduced by a kopitiam taukey to him; very nice and good girl (mind you, she’s a Pastor). Unfortunately, no spark flew during the date and I was the most frustrated one – as if…… I mean this guy ever told me the reason he is not committing himself is because he is afraid that he will turn out to be like most of his friends – Separated or divorced. It upset him so much; he gets cold feet when he thinks of commitment.
“For riches or for poorer, In sickness or in health, till death do us part…” Marriages… It is so sacred to me that I can’t even think my life without the other half. I believe in a marriage constitution, I believe in keeping and staying forever in ones marriages – until death do us part. I learn this from my own mom.
There was a period of time when I was the only one home with my parent and I’ve seen how at that time dad ‘ill-treated’ mom and she just could not do anything because Dad is ALL to her and she need to stay for our sake but I guess the truth was then women didn’t had the guts to say ‘that’s it, enough is enough, I am leaving you!!!’. I am glad Mom stayed and I am happy they found HIM in time to understand that although they gets on each other’s nerve they have a mission to complete and came to the realization that they will grow old together. That really requires a lot of patience but now she ‘tormented’ him by ignoring him when he is in one of those moods!!! Bravo mom.. Power to the woman…
One important rule I learn from Mom is quoted from the Bible itself. It says whenever you are angry, don’t bring it in until the sun set (Ephesians 4:26) – I tell you; it is easier said than done. But I will surely get it if she finds out I drag it. Love is not enough, people…. Even so much more – immaturities. Guys wake up!!! These are the era where women are empowered. They discovered they don’t necessary need a husband or a man in their life. They have learned to be independent, knowledgeable and some even brings the bread home. Think twice if you intend to flirt…….;) You know who you are. Don’t even think to give her a second grading in your list. She is the most important person in your life – not your car, your games or your pets!!! Cherish her, shower her with all the attention; she will appreciate it and when you have children, be the strength, the fortress, the foundation for your family. Be involved.
I don’t know which is harder, keeping a marriage or letting it go……
I heard this a few days ago. It is in regards of mending a relationship. “We don’t just make it stick (together) but we make it glued. If it still doesn’t stick that means the pieces doesn’t fit.”
I am sorry for my friends that had to let go… My heart goes out to you for I care and I believe you deserve the best of best God can give you. I was and still saddened by it so much. It is harder if you have kids; unless they have grown up and you are able to make senses.
I wouldn’t judge you. Do what makes you happy. For once, do it because it is for you – you deserve it. It wouldn’t be easy initially but like what I told you, gear up all your support system – some may not agree with what you are doing and when you are unsure don’t only depends on your guts feeling, look-up more to the divine intervention, have peace, pick up the pieces and go on.
It was such a good weekend for me and Monday and Tuesday being an extra holidays added to the fun. I didn't feel like going back to work but butter and bread have to be put on the table. My kids had an extra day off yesterday so I let them slept over at mom's so they didn't have to wake up as early as me.
I was pissed off with Ezra when he suddenly mentioned that he had not finished his homework. This was the second time; he rather lied than to spend his CNY break doing what he was supposed to do. Boys!!!!! I had to stayed up until nearly midnight just to help him. Believe me when I say their homework are so hard. I ever failed his math!!!!! and of coz he cried - I spanked him and although I felt guilty after that but I had to do it. I explained to him I love him that was why I had to discipline him. He is grounded for 2 weeks and are being refrain from going to Anddy's clinic which he and the sister likes to do every weekends.
He seemed to be able to take it and I am going to be more strict with them now. Lord, just give me the wisdom and the strength....
Let's welcome the tiger!!!!. Needless to say; I was also busy this new year - busy eating!!!!!! Today is the second day of the tiger year. I spent half of the day feeding the rascals (I am trying to be a good mother..) Of coz, woke up around 9am upon hearing the MOTH leaving the house to help the mother in Kampung. He decided to leave the rascals with me coz it was raining. Poor kids, they didn't have breakfast before the father left. So searched the kitchen for things that I can possibly turn into something edible AND nutritious. Ended up making scones!!!!! Kids didn't fancy it. By the time they had breakfast it was lunch time. Emmmmmm so tired!!!!!!!! and I haven't taken my bath yet!!!!
Searched the kitchen again. I decided to cook mee hoon goreng. I had dried shrimp blended with red onion and chili, I had dory fish and broccoli and egg. Everything thrown in and walla!!! Kids loved it.
The kids were promised a swim by the uncle at Four Points. So around 5.30pm we went over. It was quiet......
I went over to tHe Spring to meet up with old friends. Unfortunately the place was so pricey we decided to go to Top Spot for seafood. Being the second day of CNY the only stall that was open were the Muslims. I am not being racist here but it was a very poor service, they cut throat, greedy and you just name it; you got it. I guess it happens every way during this time of the year.
I am sorry for my overseas friends; Hsioa Fern, Edward and baby Gavin who came all the way from Seattle, Jo from London, Angeline and hubby and Florence from KL and Aimee from Bintulu. I should have been a more proactive host.
Next trip, I will open my home to you and serve you all the food you love so much and didn't get when you are all away.
Have a safe journey home and hope to see you soon.
Bon voyage!!!!
Saturday, January 30, 2010
What do you know.... It's the end of January. See, I told you how time flies. Early Monday I took the day off cause I was not feeling well. What a start to 2010. The doctor diagnosed me with having asthma - that is not new. So I am on inhaler now. This morning I went to see him again because I was not sleeping well; for 3 days!!!!
I was thinking of a high pressure water jet. With Chinese New Year in two weeks, promotions are every way. My drive way is in dire need to be cleaned. By hook or by crook I told the MOTH (man of the house) to get one and one we got. Lets just wait when he can run those.
Before I know, I have been blogging for 2 years!!! I admit sometimes it is very hard to put stories on the blog. I am forever wondering whether posts I will be posting be interesting to those who willingly read my blog and sometimes I do feel that I need to give the best to those "followers". Thus came the long 'silence'. Then there will be days when I don't even know what to post and sometimes there just be merely laziness and Facebook that sidetracked me. Can you blame me?
Before I go on, Happy New Year 2010 to you. Resolutions? I wouldn't lie; I need to lose weight. This time around I have set a target. I want to be able to lose at least 10kg by December. I want to look good for my family photo which my brother schedule to happen before Christmas this year. Can I do it? We have to see.
*** photo courtesy Eric of Mushroom
This was taken 1 month after the birth of my daughter. I agree I was never a slim person but I have since gained extra load......
So how was 2009?
Personally, I had a wedding and two funeral........ and an addition to the family.
2009 was a turbulence year for me and my other half. It was a trial time. Financially it will be hard but I guess we are trusting God in that area and we have to put on hold some of the things we planned just so that we can just adjust.
I have never like changes.. because it exposes me to the elements that I can't control and when I can't control, I loose focus and when I am not focus nothing gets done. It applies to my every aspect of my life be it spiritually, career or monies. But I will have to also remember that; all that I have is the Lord, He provides for all my needs and nothing that I am lacking. I might not drive a big car but I get around, I might not eat KFC everyday but mom cook good food and I might not wear Chanel at least I am not naked and I sleep well at night.
I want to start my new year with a positive note. If over the last year(s) I've make you upset and I said things that may hurt you; accept my apology. Thus I am mere human. Please do not judge me because when you do, you are stereotyping me. I am not as bad as you think because I can be worst. Do not even try me because it will change how I look at you. I dare you!!!!!
That's it personally.
Besides that, I aim to do justice to "my dwelling place". I've been neglecting it for a simple reason - suddenly I have a baby in the house. My in-laws will bring Robin and stay with me. My own has grown-up; they make different messes. So as it is, I have to put all my plans on hold (iskh.... iskh.... iskh....). I hope this year will be different.......
Again, I try to separate myself from attaching so much on material things and anything that is not good for ones' soul. I need to patch-up with Him and that is the most important agenda this year. Forget slimming down, forget the house, forget the leads target. I need to focus my eyes upward.......
